#541

• What did the mermaid do last Sunday night?
• She went to sea a movie.

#542

• How do you get 27 kids to carve a statue?
• Have everybody chip in.

#543

• Why do most people have trouble obtaining blood transfusions in Taiwan?
• Because they only have Taipei.

#544

• How do you know policemen are strong?
• Because they can hold up traffic.

#545

• Why didn't the skeleton go to the party?
• He had no body to go with.

#546

• What's red and smells like blue paint?
• Red paint.

#547

• Why does the letter A look like a flower?
• Because Bs like flowers.

#548

• What do you get when you cross a sheltie and a cantaloupe?
• A melon collie.

#549

• Why did the hearing aid saleman give it up for a life of piracy?
• Because he only made a good buccaneer.

#550

Daniel and Ginny are walking down the street one evening. As they pass one house, they hear loud shouting and crashes inside. Peter and Elizabeth Jones live there and are having a fierce argument. At the height of the quarrel, Peter picks up a table lamp, rips it out of the wall, and hurls it at Elizabeth. Elizabeth ducks, and the lamp flies past her through the window. It sails over Daniel and Ginny's heads. Daniel looks up and exclaims, "Soft! What light through yonder window breaks!"